How To Make The Most Of A Conference As An Introvert

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I began attending conferences about two or three years ago when I first started my coaching business. Since my husband and I both used to work in the mental health and substance use disorder space, all of the conferences were really geared towards those topics. Not always the most fun or interesting.

Attending conferences as an introvert was also very draining. I spent most of the time in our hotel room or by the pool for the first few and would just go to dinners my husband set up. Over the years, I started to learn ways to make the most out of my time at a conference as an introvert which really paid off last weekend as I attended my first ever blog conference!

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First of all, a blog conference is so different than a health related conference! Everyone feels more relaxed, dresses way cuter, and the energy everywhere you turn is just inspiring! I had so much fun meeting some of you all in person and listening to some seriously inspiring speakers. Unlike past conferences, where I holed up in my hotel room nursing a headache, I actually feel like I made the most out of this conference and wanted to share my times on how you can do the same as an introvert:

10 Tips To Make The Most Out Of A Conference As An Introvert:

Pack Your Apple TV

REALTALK: Nothing recharges me like watching TV. Even when we picked our wedding venue, I checked the TV in the bedroom to make sure I could jailbreak it and get my Apple TV sync'ed up. I know you can watch Netflix on your phone or computer, but there is something about laying in bed and watching TV that feels different to me.

You can call most hotels IT Support number (found in your room or at the front desk) to get your IP address approved. Another option, if you're a Mac user and have apple tv, you can remap your computer's IP address to be your Apple TV's IP address so you can “approve” the internet connection, then just switch it back. Follow these instructions here   (this is what I typically do).

If TV isn't your thing, then pack a book, pack whatever recharges you!

Get Clear On Why You're Attending

You're obviously there to learn and network! But that can look different for everyone.

Networking goals:

In my case, this was my first blog conference so I wanted to put some faces to the blogs I read and meet some of my digital friends in person! I let go of the additional pressure that I needed to make a brand connection that guaranteed a contract by the end. I did leave with some wonderful warm leads that I think you guys are going to love, but nothing concrete, and that's okay!

Learning goals:

The other thing I really wanted during this conference was to learn some new things to improve my intimate writing, which was why the majority of the workshops I was trying to attend focused on personal storytelling. My secondary learning goal was monetizing and blog maintenance, which I attended and learned from some of those sessions too. But with a workshop schedule that's so broad, its important to narrow down what exactly you want to learn during your time and prioritize accordingly.

The unexpected “why”:

I didn't realize this when I attended, but it became apparent right away, the inspiration and motivation. If you're ever in a blogger rut, attend a conference! I didn't even think about the motivation and focus I would leave with, but it happened. It's the unexpected why if you will. Legit, if you've never heard of Luvvie before, she is my new #goals:

Before the conference:

Plan. Be Flexible. Give Yourself Breaks.

Now that you're clear on your goals for attending, plan out your schedule. Before arriving decide which events and workshops you want to attend. If there are multiple things you want to do at that time, add them all to your schedule. This will allow you to get into a flexible mindset from the get go. If something isn't working for you, you can look at your schedule and adjust seamlessly. Make sure to also pad your schedule with some “break time.”

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If your like me, and get headaches after prolonged conversations with others, try to schedule you expo time at the very end of the day. If it will only work for your schedule in the morning, make sure you have some headache medicine, water, and a snack to help you recharge and focus while your learning in a workshop session. The last thing you want is to go to the expo, feel so drained, that you can't even process the information you want to learn!

Arrive Late & Cut Out Early

On the note of planning, arrive late and cut out early! Often conferences will offer some sort of breakfast and morning keynote or meet and greet. Personally, I am not a morning person. In the past, I always sent my husband downstairs to sneak some breakfast up to me as I finish my second cup of coffee before heading into the lions den. If you can't have breakfast brought to you, head down (legit went down in sweats during this conference), grab a plate, and sit in a quiet (preferably dark) corner away from the hustle nad bustle. Then head immediately back up stairs for your second cup of coffee.

On the same note, a lot of conferences save their best speakers and content for midday. They know that people want to sleep in, or leave early to either do more personal networking or recharge. I have never been to a conference where by 2 pm on the final day everyone is still there. Instead you find most people at the pool, packing to leave, or at private meetings.

Trust me, you aren't doing yourself any favors forcing yourself to do more than you are ready to do.

Dress Comfortably

For those of you who can rock heels all day, I tip my hat to you.  But for me, nothing sucks the life out of me like wearing heels. I recommend keeping things comfortable and versatile. As a Florida native, I am used to 60 degrees inside a conference room, and 95 when you step outside. Keep in mind, that different rooms will have different AC settings. Dress in light and comfortable layers that can easily be put into a purse so you don't have to hold them.

Bring Your Own Water Bottle

Conferences will provide water throughout the venue, however the cups are often tiny and don't have lids. I am a klutz and nothing stresses me out more than juggling all my conference swag and accidentally spilling my water. I also legit dribble water when drinking from a cup without a straw in stressful situations #embarrassing. When I'm in nervous situations, I also like having something other than my phone to keep in my hand and fidget with. Plus, if you have an opaque container, you can use it as an reason to excuse yourself when you need to break away from a convo.

During the conference:

Breathe.

It's only a few days. Your time in this unexpected fast moving environment is temporary. Take deep breaths, remember you are getting exactly the experience the Universe intended you to receive. Stay open. Breathe deep. Be present.

The first keynote of the conference kicked off with a mindfulness moment by Starr Barbour, which was amazing! It set the intention to be still and present throughout the next few days. Remember that moment of tranquility you experience in yoga? Remember, you can reconnect to that feeling at any moment in time, in any place. Put both feet on the ground, face your palms up, and breathe from your belly.

Find a buddy

In the past, I've always attended conferences with my husband since we were in the same industry. He is a total extrovert so it made working the room super easy as I could piggyback off of him. This was my first solo conference as an introvert. Luckily I ran into my friend Rachel from Small Town & City Lights at registration and she became my buddy for the majority of the conference. It was nice to have her as support in the expo hall or while navigating particularly overwhelming situations. I wouldn't recommend staying glued to your buddy though. Stay true to your “why” and work on checking off your conference goals, but it's nice to have someone to text when you're feeling overwhelmed. Thanks, Rach!

rachel gualt, small town and city lights, millennial bloggers at blogher, she knows media

Shop this dress (it's only $13!!!)

Let go of FOMO

You cannot be in all the places at once. Conferences are jam packed with things to do and people to meet. It's impossible to be a part of all of it. Instead, take cues from your body and adjust. You've already planned out your schedule and have multiple options for each time of the day. Go with the flow and if you aren't enjoying what you're doing, go to do something one of your backup options.

I did this at BlogHer, there were three workshops happening at the same time I really wanted to attend. I had some personal drama come up as a result of my Fatherless Father's Day post that morning, so I decided to go to the intimate writing workshop. Only the workshop focused a lot more on privacy, particularly with children, than actual intimate writing.

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I quickly realized this was not what I wanted to be hearing and was rubbed the wrong way by a few people's questions in the session. I left and decided to hit up the digital advertising workshop which had (literally) a line out the door. This is when I decided to listen to my body (I had a massive headache by this point #introvert problems) and decided to go to my third option, book publishing (you might remember from my blogging awards post that my goal is to publish a memoir someday!). This workshop was legit fire. It was exactly where I was supposed to be and I learned SO much.

Grab people's business cards

The conference should just be the jumping off point for new relationships. It's perfectly okay to cut out early from small talk but ask for their business card to stay in touch. Trust me, as someone with some serious RBF and RBVoice, I would much rather excuse myself and follow up with someone I am interested in later. Otherwise, I likely leave them with a poor impression of me because I couldn't get my energy in check.

Remember, stay true to yourself and your goals. Everyone is feeling overwhelmed too.

Have you ever attended a conference before? What tips would you add?

62 thoughts on “How To Make The Most Of A Conference As An Introvert”

  1. This is super helpful! I’m somewhere between an extrovert and an introvert but I also suffer from anxiety so going to a blogging conference scares the daylights out of me LOL but I also know it would be super helpful.
    I’m really surprised that you suggested going late and leaving early. It totally makes sense though and is very true of every conference I’ve been to for my old job! I’m so relieved to know I can do that and not look rude, haha!

  2. This sounded like SO much fun! I have yet to attend a conference.. but it is on my bucket list. I am totally an extrovert, but that can be hard, too, because you always feel like you are being too much. I guess there are ups & downs to both. But, having these tips could really help someone that is struggling so they can find a connection & not feel alone! xx

  3. Kaitlyn Fickle Killebrew

    Omg BlogHer sounded like a great time! I’m dying to go, hopefully next year! Would love to meet you and other bloggers that I follow along with! ☺️

  4. Im so jealous! They offered me a ticket but I just couldn’t leave the baby yet! Im a huge introvert so this post really spoke to me

  5. I love the tip about opaque water bottles being a good way to break away from a conversation. A great tip for all of us introverts in any kind of social event!

  6. Jessica Bradshaw

    This is awesome. I feel like I fall in the closet introvert category too. I have alway wanted to go to BlogHer. Maybe I can make it next year!

  7. I was offered a ticket too, but had a wedding! I really really wanted to go. I’m a total introvert too so these tips are the best. I get seriously overwhelmed at conferences and events where I don’t know people.

  8. Alissa Carpenter

    Some seriously great tips especially FOMO! I always find there are either a million things I want to see at a session time or none… so strange. I either tag team and someone goes to one and I go to another, do what you did and try it out and if its not for me peace out, or just go to one and hope for the best. A lot of conferences post slide decks after or you will inevitably meet someone who went to that session and swap notes. It’s not worth worrying about what you missed and important to focus on what you’ve learned!

  9. Rachel, this is exactly what I needed to hear. I’m attending a conference in two weeks to become a supervisor for limited licensed counselors and as much as I’m looking forward to expanding my education and my career opportunities, I also know that my introverted side is already exhausted. I’m going to the conference alone (a first for me) and it that feels daunting and scary! I will definitely be taking you up on some of your tips– bringing a water bottle (why have I never thought of that!), Finding a buddy (the pain of being an introvert– I want friends but don’t want to talk to people haha), and letting go of FOMO. I was planning on commuting 1.5 hours each way for four days, but now I’m seriously considering booking a hotel room. Thanks again!

  10. Denay DeGuzman

    These are helpful, actionable tips for dealing with life at a conference when you’re not feeling up to mingling. I agree about skipping the keynote if you’re struggling with socializing – that first day of a bloggers convention can be packed. But the best idea is to arrive a with friend and roommate during the conference. Having a buddy by your side is all you’ll need!

  11. These are such great tips! In my industry, I don’t have to attend conferences, but we do have a ton of “mandatory” team events where we basically have to socialize after work. I’m going to definitely try your “arrive late and cut out early” tactic. I’m an introvert when it comes to meeting new people and once I get comfortable, I’m an extrovert, haha. Definitely agree with having a friend present- I feel like most social situations are a thousand times easier when you have a friend to help you out!

  12. Jennifer Schmidt

    I miss my mouth when drinking out of cups when Im nervous…or just in my everyday klutzy life so I totally get bringing my own bottle. Taking Apple TV to hotels is genius! Never thought about it. I have being stuck in a hotel with only cable. Over the years I have learned how to make friends easily which helps when going to big conferences! Glad you had a great time and got to go to the book publishing session. That is a goal of mine also.

  13. I’m an introvert too and would rather have my teeth drilled in a dentist’s chair than make small talk at a meet & greet. But, I am goal-oriented. Give me a task and I’ll make it happen – so your tip about being clear why you’re there is great for me. It gives a task to accomplish – even if that task involves people-ing. ?

  14. These sound perfect for me! I’ll be sure to keep them in mind for the next conference I attend!

  15. Patricia Conte

    Such good tips! How exciting that you got to attend BlogHer! I love this post, b/c no matter how many conferences I attend, it’s still a little scary, but always turns into a great experience!

  16. These are all such great tips! It’s definitely (more) intimidating when you’re at a conference by yourself so if you can find a buddy it makes all the difference! So glad we were able to connect in real life and explore a lot of the conference together 🙂

  17. These are all such great tips! I haaateeeee attending conferences. I get that they are beneficial but I hate it haha I go to 2 trade shows a year and I always have to go by myself bc Mike usually has to work and he stays home with Myla. But thankfully I know exactly the kind of business I am looking for when I’m at the shows so it’s really easy for me to walk the floor, find the booths I need, introduce myself/get their card, and then say I ‘have a meeting to get to’ and dip out really fast hahah oops

  18. Absolutely plan your schedule – with breaks! And remember you cannot Learn All the Things! If you try, your brain will be mush by the end… (And then, yes, change the plan when it makes sense…)

    I recharge with a book and music, but it’s the concept that’s vital. I have a friend whose conference experience is largely as a presenter – she works in education for a software company. People start descending on her and asking questions before she gets her coffee at breakfast! So in the evening, when everyone else goes out to dinner and networks, she retreats to her room for a room service dinner, bubble bath, and a book… She says it’s the only way she can get up and do it again every morning!

  19. Elizabeth Johnson

    I have never attended a conference before. I really want to! I love how you break everything down. I would have never thought to bring an Apple TV. Like you, I bring my own water bottle every where I go. It would be my luck to spill a cup full of water on everyone’s stuff. haha You are so right, everyone is overwhelmed too. It is a fire house of information and every one else is trying to gather as much info as possible. Thanks for the info! And I am so glad we got to meet up!! 🙂

  20. Patrice Walker

    Great tips! I want to attend a blogger conference but I let the fear of being socially awkward talk me out of committing. One day I will, and I’ll be looking over these tips for help!

  21. I’m going to my first blog conference in a month and I’m a little nervous. I’m an introvert myself so I’m going to need to balance my me time with conference time haha.

  22. I love that you hack your TV. That is hilarious. I can’t wait to go to my first blog conference!

  23. Definitely needed to read this! I am a huge introvert, so the thought of attending a conference scares the heck out of me!! But I love your tips and hoping that one day I can get a little more confidence to attend a conference 🙂

    Lauren
    http://www.basicbabelauren.com

  24. Great tips. As you mentioned, I think it’s important to remember why you’re at the conference – sometimes just reminding myself that I’m there to help my business grow “forces” me out of my comfort zone.

  25. I am totally saving this! I am looking to attend more conferences soon, but I get pretty shy sometimes

  26. Kaitlyn Fickle Killebrew

    This conference seemed awesome! Definitely on my goals list for next year!

  27. Divya Budhraja

    These are really great suggestions! Most of the conferences I’ve been to have a few events going on at one time and they typically give you an agenda ahead of time. What’s helped me is mapping out my days and knowing exactly where I need to be and when!

  28. I feel like you spoke to me when you mentioned having your husband go down to bring you back breakfast in order for you to have your second cup! Haha, but seriously though – I haven’t been to a blogging conference… yet, not really sure how to find them in my area, or what to do in terms of going to them – but they sound super motivating! And I live in Orlando so it’s conference city over here, and your tips are awesome – from one introvert to another (right here!) – and I will definitely keep your tips in mind! 🙂

  29. Great tips! I’m such an introvert, but I used to actually speak at conferences and had to stand in front of hundreds of people. Eeek! I’m glad those days are over. I’d love to attend a blogging conference, but I’m never sure how to find the best one? Maybe that would be a good future post for you…how to find the best blogger conferences to attend. 🙂

  30. I love this, I hope to attend a blogging conference next year and will be coming back to this post to review before I go! (I pinned it!)

  31. Makaela Premont

    I just recently came from a health related business type of conference! Everything is so true! I’m a big introvert so I need my quite time alone and by myself. I really enjoyed this post!

    -xo, Makaela
    http://www.uniquelymickie.com

  32. I am the biggest introvert and have been to a few conferences and felt so weird being there because I didn’t know how to handle myself around people. I need more confidence. I needed to read this!

  33. GOOD FOR YOU for going to this on your own! I’m the same as you (of course) – I’m an introvert who loves nothing more than connecting with people, but I really lean on my husband to open and sustain conversations in groups, while I thrive in one-on-one settings on my own terms. I’ve barely even entertained the thought of going to a conference because I know I’d feel simultaneous social anxiety (if I participated in ALL the things) and FOMO (if I sat things out to give myself a break). But I’m definitely in need of a burst of inspiration, motivation, and solidarity – so something like this might be a very good idea.

  34. thesophiadiaries

    Thanks for these tips! I hope I eventually get to visit blogging conferences to meet my fellow bloggers as well <3 probably that's when I should get a business card xD

  35. I have not attended a writing conference but get incredibly burnt out by these sort of things. Thank you for the tips. I totally feel more prepared.

  36. ugh i’m def not a morning person either. arriving late/leaving early is a great idea! x

  37. I absolutely LOVE this! As in introvert myself, I find that it can definitely be hard putting yourself out there each day for the duration of a conference or similar event. Making time to decompress each evening is definitely key to make sure you’re ready to go the following day, and learning you can’t do everything is so important. I’m not a morning person either haha, so I would definitely send my fiance down to grab food and more coffee for me too!

  38. I love your tips! I just attended my first conference as an introvert. It was very small which was nice. I will be going to a huge conference soon. For me, I need my own room so I can escape if I need to. 🙂

  39. Deborah Francisco

    I love your blog! I’m an introvert and I get that nervous feeling when I go to a conference by myself and have to force myself to meet people. But it ends up being really fun! Having a buddy (or making one there) is key.

  40. Love this! Going to conferences can be so hard if you’re an introvert. These are all such good tips. I’ve found that making sure I can take a break at the end of the day can be so helpful and to find quiet corners to go to if I need a quick break during the conference. Also, being flexible is so important! I haven’t been to a blogging conference, but I’ve been to writing conference and I don’t think I have ever strictly followed my schedule. I’ve found that once you’re there and you start to meet people/get to know the different speakers sometimes your priorities for the sessions you want to attend change. 🙂 For me it’s mostly been that last one… I’ve gone to sessions in place of other sessions I’d been planning on (and at times really wanted to attend) because I’ve really liked a speaker and decided to attend their next session instead.

  41. This is a great post! I can’t really pin what I am. It just depends on the day. I am a photographer so I have no choice to talk to people I have never met before. But also there are days I just want to crawl under a rock! Good for you for pushing through it to attend!!

  42. Reesa Lewandowski

    This is such a great perspective! I like doing things on my own because sometimes people I go with are NOT introverts! It’s easier this way! I like the idea of letting go of FOMO. It can make things very overwhelming!

  43. Sharon Glascoe

    I went to my first conference last month and had a blast! I let go of the introvert-inspired fears and just got my networking on. I had a blast an cannot wait to go to my next one 🙂

  44. Love this! People always give me a hard time at conferences because I’ll often sit a session or two out because I just need time for me, but I get so much more value out of it that way!

  45. Oyinkan Ogunleye

    It’s extremely important to understand the why of it all. Once your intensions are clear, you’ll be good to go as an introvert.

  46. I’m naturally an introvert but I love attending blogging and fitness conferences. Surrounded by people sharing a passion. I love it.

  47. This is a great guide. In the beginning I found it really difficult to attend conferences although I knew they were extremely important if I was really serious about blogging. Over the years I have found that blogging is really full of amazing people and I really didn’t need to be so shy. Loved your tips too btw.

  48. Hannah Palamara

    I love this post! I am a total introvert when I am in new situations. So much so that I avoid attending conferences and events at times because I’m so anxious about it! But I really loved the tips you gave.

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